Okay, there’s a long, boring, dry list of things that an agent or editor really doesn’t want to see. One of them is verbose line after lengthy line while trying to get to the gist of the story.
When a story’s strength relies on adjectives and adverbs to beef it up, the story’s in trouble right out of the swinging, slat-deprived gate. A wonderful story can be told with virtually no adverbs and no adjectives. A few are thrown in now and then for flavor, but when the entire story depends on crutches to strengthen weak storyline, weak nouns, and weak verbs, then the writer is shamefully in trouble.
YES, a well-placed, once-in-a-while “addition” is fine, but I’m seeing a lot of submissions that depend on the flowery language while short changing the reader with little substance in the “meat” of the story.
Write a solid piece, neatly, accurately, and profoundly. A story that keeps the reader turning pages whether or not the guy looks like a super hero. And the girl need not have raven black hair and emerald, indigo, or ocean blue eyes. These are all fine if the rest of the narration forces the reader to continue reading on into the night. And not the dark and stormy night. Just the night when she or he should be sleeping cozily, but can’t because he or she is so adamantly engrossed in what is happening to wonderful Hero and air-head Raven Hair that the book just can’t be put down!
Remember, it’s all about the story. Even poor grammar and punctuation can sometimes be overlooked if the story is so amazing that it simply HAS to be told.